Polygyny in Islaam

Monogamy vs. Polygyny
And

Illegal Polygamy of the West vs. So-called Monogamy of the West!

 

By: Shahid Bin Waheed شاهد بن وحيد

 

بسم الله الرحمن الرحيم

الحمدلله رب العالمين والصلوة والسلام على اشرف الانبياء وسيدالمرسلين نبينا محمد صل ا لله عليه وعلى آله واصحابه وازواجه اجمعين - امابعد

All the praises and thanks be to Allaah, Sustainer of the Universe, and blessing and salutation to be the most distinguish of the Messengers and foremost among the Prophets, our Prophet Muhammad, peace and blessings of Allaah be on him and on his wives, children and Companions.

 

Surah An-Nisaa 3

فَانْكِحُوا مَا طَابَ لَكُمْ مِنَ النِّسَاءِ مَثْنَى وَثُلَاثَ وَرُبَاعَ

marry (other) women of your choice, two or three, or four;

 

The fact of the matter is that Islaam allows conditional Polygyny (by limiting the number of wives a man can have), as the Divine Command we find in Ayah 4:3! Though the background and the wording of the Ayah 4:3 appear to express a commandment, which should be only temporary in effect. That is to say that it applied only to a particular state of emergency when, due to the loss of 70 men in the battle of Uhud, the number of women exceeded the number of available Muslim men. But the Glorious Qur’aan, despite its having been revealed at a particular time and place, is universal in application. One of the great characteristics of the Glorious Qur’aan is that it describes eternal realities, with reference to temporal issues, this commandment being typical of this special quality of the Glorious Qur’aan.

 

One point greatly in need of the clarification is the fact that in the matter of marrying more than one woman, the initiative does not lie solely with any individual man. There is always the condition- an inescapable one- that whatever the society, the women should outnumber the men. Suppose the world population is equally divided between men and women (each gender is equal half of the world population), then it would be impossible in such a situation for a man to have more than one wife, unless the 2nd, 3rd, or 4th wife is obtained by use of force. But in Islaam a forced marriage is prohibited and is not considered lawful. According to Shariah the willingness of the bride-to-be is a compulsory condition.

 

By looking with a practical point of view, the commands in Ayah 4:3 to marry up to four wives can be complied with only if the particular situation exists in society, which existed in Madinah after the Battle of Uhud i.e., that there is a disproportion in the ratio of men and women. In the absence of such situation, this commandment of the Glorious Qur’aan would be inapplicable. But the studies of human society and its history have shown that the situation in ancient Madinah was not one, which existed only at a particular point of time. It is a situation, which had almost always been prevalent throughout the entire world. That situation of emergency is, in fact, the general situation of mankind. Thus, the commandment in Ayah 4:3 to marry two, three or four wives is yet another proof of Allaah’s omniscience. His commandment, seemingly elicited by an emergency, became an eternal commandment for the entire world.

 

The Inequality in Numbers!

 

Records shows that the male and female births are almost equal in numbers, but the study of mortality shows that the rate is higher for men than for women. This disparity is evidence from early childhood to extreme old age. According to the Encyclopedia Britannica: “In general, the risk of death at any given age is less for female than for males.” [Encyclopedia Britannica 1984, vol. 7, page 37] The proportionality of the higher number of women in society can be traced to a variety of causes, for instance when a war breaks out, the majority of the casualties are the men:

 

·        In Palestine, Israel has been killing mainly Muslim men and boys for the past 54 years and has been wiping out the future.

·        In the 1st world war (1914-1918) about eight million soldiers were killed, beside that most of the civilians killed were also men.

·        In the 2nd world war (1939-1945) about sixty million people were killed or maimed for life, again, most of them were men.

·        In Iran-Iraq war alone (1979-1988) 82, 000 Iranian women and about 100,000 Iraqi women were widowed.

·        Another drain on the availability of men in society is imprisonment. In the US and most of the other so-called civilized societies of modern times no less 1.3 million people are convicted daily for different crimes, and 97% of them are men. [Encyclopedia Britannica 1984, vol. 14, page. 1102]

·        The modern industrial system also contributed to men mortality. According to a 1967 data, in that year alone 175,000 people died as a result of accidents in 50 different countries, most of these were men. [Ibid vol. 16, page. 137]

 

The above are the few examples out of countless causes of men mortality, which leads to women continue to outnumber men. This difference persists in even the most develop societies, e.g. in USA. According to the data collected in 1967, there were nearly 7,100,000 more women than men. This means that even if every single man in America got married, 7,100,000 women would be left without husbands. The data cited below of several countries (not all) show ratio of men and women (figures taken from the Encyclopedia Britannica 1984):

 

Country

Female Population

Male Population

Austria

52.93%

47.07%

Burma

51.19%

48.81%

Germany    

51.98%

48.02%

France        

51.01%

48.99%

Italy

51.11%

48.89%

Poland       

51.39%

48.61%

Spain

51.06%

48.94%

Switzerland

51.33%

48.67%

Soviet Union

53.41%

46.59%

United States

51.42%

48.58%

 

 

The Willingness of Women!

 

The presence of a greater number of women in a society is not the only prerequisite of Polygyny in Islaam. It is, in addition, compulsory that the woman who is object of the man’s choice should be willing to enter into the marriage contract. This willingness on the woman’s part is a must before a marriage can be lawful in Islaam. It is unlawful to marry a woman by force. There is no example in the history of Islaam where a man has been allowed to force a woman into marriage. The Prophet Muhammad’s (SAW) own view that “an unmarried girl should not be married until her permission has been taken.” [Bukhari, Sahih, Bab la Yunkihu al-Ab wa Ghairuhu al-Bikra wath-Thayyiba illa bi Ridaha {Fath Al-Bari, 9:157}]

 

A Solution to a Problem Rather Than a Commandment!

 

The above brief facts make it clear that the difference in number of men and women is a permanent problem that has existed in human society in both war and peace. Thus the questions are:

 

·         How to solve this problem?

·        What should the women do to satisfy their natural urges, when they fail to find a husband in a monogamous society?

·        And how the women can secure an honorable life in that society?

 

In Indian society (in Hindu religion) there is a tradition for widows to burn themselves to death along with their husband cremation. But Islaam prohibits such barbaric acts against any living being, let alone women.

 

UNLAWFUL POLYGYNY!

 

The people who would outlaw the Polygyny have to pay the price. That is, they are forced to tolerate free mixing of sexes and men and women having illicit relations, which is surely a much more unsavory state of affairs. This evilness has been in so-called western societies like USA, Canada, Europe etc. where 51% children (in USA alone) born out of wedlock. Failure to control a natural process whereby the male population dwindles, leaving “surplus” women, coupled with outlawing of Polygyny, has given rise to the evil of the mistress (defined as A woman who has a continuing sexual relationship with a usually married man who is not her husband and from whom she generally receives material support). This, in fact, is a set up illegal Polygyny in the countries who have outlawed the Polygyny.

 

THE ISLAAMIC WAY!   

 

The solution to this problem in the Islaamic Shariah is the giving permission to man under the circumstances cited above and/or need to marry more than one woman is also based on the following Islaamic wisdom:

 

(1)  The wife is a source of comfort and peace. She helps remove sadness and thousands of worries. Man is instinctively inclined to make friends and show love and a woman is best suited to receive these sentiments. A woman is delicate-bodied and weak but shows responsibility in rearing children and looking after her household. She is a splendid support to man. So, man must be compassionate to her. Allaah has created her to be merciful and man must overlook her negligence and natural weakness.

(2)  Man is naturally inclined towards sex, and nature has allowed him to have recourse to his wife. Allaah has said that she is a tillage where seed may be sown. Just as it is necessary to look after the field and there are special interests so too there are peculiar characteristics in a woman and she must be enjoyed.

(3)  It is known from the Glorious Qur’aan that marriage (Nikah) is a mean to protect CHASTITY, HONOR, HEALTH and LINEAGE. Allah says,

 

Surah Ar-Rum 21

وَمِنْ آيَاتِهِ أَنْ خَلَقَ لَكُمْ مِنْ أَنْفُسِكُمْ أَزْوَاجًا لِتَسْكُنُوا إِلَيْهَا وَجَعَلَ بَيْنَكُمْ مَوَدَّةً وَرَحْمَةً إِنَّ فِي ذَلِكَ لَآيَاتٍ لِقَوْمٍ يَتَفَكَّرُونَ

And among His Signs is this, that He created for you wives from among yourselves, that you may find repose in them, and He has put between you affection and mercy. Verily, in that are indeed signs for a people who reflect.

 

Summary of the reasons allowing Polygyny in Islaam:

 

(1) Taqwa (A God-fearing attitude).

(2) Preservation of Vigor.

(3) Even in case of disagreement divorce is avoided.

(4)  A wife may be effete-incapable of producing offspring.

(5)  In some countries, or families, there is a surplus of female children.

(6)  War, famine, or any other reason can cause gender misbalance that often results in more male mortality than female, as it is always the case.

(7)  Political expediency.

(8) A woman does not remain generally fertile after fifty years of age while a man in fertile at 90+     years of age.

(9) Adultery is very common in those countries where it is not allowed to marry more than one wife.

(10) Some men have higher sexual appetite and single wife can’t satisfy them.

 

The Encyclopedia Britannica (1984) aptly concludes that one reason for adopting polygamy is the surplus women. Among most people who permit and/or prefer it, the large majority of men live in state of monogamy because of the limited number of women. [Vol. 8, page. 87]

 

To have more than one wife is not an ideal in Islaam. It is, in essence, is a practical solution to a social problem. On the contrary by following the principle of monogamy, hundreds of thousands of women fail to find husbands for themselves and are thus denied an honorable place in the society. Monogamy an absolute principle may seem pleasing to some and/or in the west, but events show that this is not fully practicable in the world of today.

 

In conclusion, the choice for mankind, therefore, is not between monogamy and Polygyny, but rather the lawful Polygyny of Islaam and the illicit polygamy of non-Islaamic people and/or societies. The latter system leaves “surplus” women to live lives of sexual anarchy and social destruction. The former, on the other hand, permits them to opt on their own free will for marriage with anyone who can give them fair treatment to more than one wife. Islaam offers a package deal with perfect solutions to this worldwide social problem.

 

Monday, October 18, 2004

 

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